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As you can all see, I failed quite miserably at posting every day in Novemeber. I had really good intentions of doing so, but I just couldn’t pick myself up and place myself in front of my computer. I am currently sitting at our new computer! It’s great! 
Anyway, back to the originally schedule blog.
My coworker told me a story of what happened to her recently. She was leaving Target in Castleton. She was at a stoplight (if you’re familar with that area, it’s the only one by Target). She and her 14 year old son were in the car. She saw someone cross the road behind their car and noticed that he ducked down behind her car. She locked the doors immediately. She then saw him creep up on the side of the car and grab her door handle (she was in the driver’s seat). She screamed and the guy took off running.
She did call the police the following day to report the incident. It’s quite terrifying for me to think about. I’ve been pretty paranoid about locking my car while driving now, because it never occured to me that it could happen–you could of course always slam on the gas, but what if the guy was quick with a knife or a gun.
I thought I’d share that with you, to make you ponder your own safety. It’s not meant to scare, but hopefully could prevent something from happening to you.
I was reading on CNN News, that rapper Heavy D passed away. I’m not a Heavy D fan, though I don’t remember his face and some of his work. What struck me about the article however were the mentions of his final Twitter posts. The night before he passed he had made comments praising the former champ boxer Joe Frazier who also passed away this week.
Heavy D’s last tweet was, “BE INSPIRED.”
I’ve thought about this idea a time or two. How often times, when someone passes away others (my self included) immediately go to their Facebook or Twitter. Their blog, check for old emails or text messages. It’s almost a way of holding on. A way to prove that they were once so alive and now trying so hard to understand that they are simply gone, however unsimple that really is.
I did this a lot when my friend Bryan passed away. I read over all his quotes on Facebook, they matched up with the guy he truly was and it was comforting to read those. Reading through our old emails, was almost like a part of him was always here.
Photos have this same effect. I love to take photos of every even in my life. I get some grief for it from time to time, but they are so important in the long run, they capture memories that otherwise might fade. They allows us to relive what other wise might pass away.
I think to myself sometimes, man, if I died right now—this would be what people would see. This would be my photo forever, this would be the last status or update anyone would see from–what would they think. Maybe it’s a strange or unimportant thing in life, but its very much part of what we do now. This isn’t to say we will be remembered by the fact that our last status update might be something somewhat selfish or complainy or even something bizarre and silly.
And perhaps this is all so inconsequential we shouldn’t care about it.
But I’d want to leave behind last words of, “BE INSPIRED.” I want my last words, my last actions to be something worth leaning on.
But more than anything, I want to leave behind a whole life that is worth remembering, worth raising a drink to. Worth shedding tears for. Worth scouring your inbox for, your texts for, your brain for. Not because I feel self-important, but because I want to make a positive difference in your life, one laugh at a time. Have I also done this for every single person? No, I haven’t, I’ve hurt plenty. But in the past few years I’ve consistenly become the Isha, that could die feeling like the world, or at the very least, the people I love have been changed for the better.
People, “be inspired.”
A couple months ago Joshua and I went to an Indian’s game downtown. It got out pretty late, way after dark. We were walking the few blocks back to our car and we were just about there. A woman, was walking towards us. She was African American. We were about a parking space or so away from our car, so I stepped down into the road, to get to the driver’s side and to make room for her to pass. As she passed she said something along the lines of, “Good evening, you don’t have to be afraid of every black person you see.”
I was immediately heated and turned to contest what she said. I raised my voice to let her know that was not at all why I had stepped off the sidewalk, that I was merely going to the driver’s side as we had reached my car. I don’t remember what else I said, but looking back, I should have approached it differently, not in anger, because she probably had plenty of fuel behind her comment.
However, I don’t think her reaction to what she thought was happening was appropriate. I really wanted to explain to her, that not only was I not afraid of her, we had just walked several blocks with an African American couple. That I have plenty of black family members and friends. That at night, it wouldn’t make a different if a black man were walking toward me or if a white man were, if I were alone, I’d still be worried. But of course I didn’t get that chance. What I got was frustration and what Joshua got was a mouthful about how I felt.
I’m white, so I of course don’t have the experience of what it’s like to be truly ridiculed simply because of the color of my skin. That isn’t to say I haven’t felt judged my the color of my skin, which in the past has made me feel like the other person thinks I’m some “stupid white girl.” I know those moments are next to nothing compared to the vast racism towards many other groups worldwide. But I don’t want the past to dictate the way we choose to react to one another. Is that to say we will all go without judging one another? I don’t think so, I don’t know if it’s possible yet. But we can strive to make the difference in the way we react and treat one another.
I felt like her comments only set us back further. My reaction should not have been in anger but in understanding and then in explanation. A gentle reaction could have made the difference. It’s been on my mind since it has happened and at first, I felt so unjustly treated, but that seems selfish now. Now, I just want to make the positive difference, not in just that situation but in any.
The overall lesson from what happened in this situation and with talking to my friend Maurice is, as he says, “Striving to listen.” Reactions happen for a reason, while they may not be personal they can feel personal. When in reality, they are probably deep seeded. Learn to listen, learn to find the gentle answer. Be the difference.
Proverbs 15:1-A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
I love the weekends. It allows enough time in a day to really make progress on home projects. I was pretty tired today, so didn’t get as much done as I would have liked to, however, Joshua zoomed through things. Our home is feeling more and more like our home with each project we finish. We were able to get some more cleaning and organization done today, as well as hanging the various pictures and such we have.
We then headed to Goodwill to look for a couple of things. Low and behold they had an unopened home entertainment center and it was 50% percent off. It was already $200 dollars cheaper than it was in store, so basically we saved quite a bit of money. We were unsure of purchasing something so out of the blue, but we did research in the store thanks to my handy iPhone and determined that it was a good buy. Apparently, Goodwill can purchase items from places like Target and Walmart and resell it at their store. With the 50% storewide today, it was quite the steal. We won’t be using it however, until we buy our new TV, which we are holding on buying.
We are working on the garage later which is full of boxes and other things we need to sort through. I hope to have our home in tip top shape by the end of the year. Then relaxing while watching a movie.
I love feeling accomplished, I love coming back to a place that feels so much like home.
Days of Gratitude 5: I am thankful for the weekend. Enough said.
(This blog was written on November 4th, but I couldn’t access my site)
Tonight Joshua and I watched Corgan (Jenny and Brandon’s baby). Jenny and I planned it out a couple days ago. It was their 8th anniversary from when they first started dating. She surprised him by telling him they were just coming up to go out with us. But really, they left Mr. Corgan with us and they headed to Kona Grill for a romantic evening alone. Let me tell you, Jenny looked amazing for such a new mom! She was in a very cute blue dress!
It was good evening with the lil guy. He only cried a little bit, which was a bit surprising because he has been struggling with acid reflux. Mostly he hung out and looked around. However, at one point he had quite the farts and pooped straight through his clothes! So we got him all changed and clean but he moved twice more! He did some eating and then just hung out with us. Later, when Josh took him, he fell right asleep on Josh’s chest.
Jenny and Brandon got back a few hours later and we sat around and chit chatted. It was good. They probably stayed too late because I know they were tired, but Jenny and I just kept on talking.
This brings me to my days of gratitude.
For today (day 4), I’m thankful for friends who talk so much it makes it hard to leave. They kept trying to leave but then Jenny or I would have something else we’d need to talk about or laugh about. It’s a good feeling. I miss this already.
Yesterday’s (day 3) gratitude was for good teachers who make learning fun and bring humor to it. I had training all day yesterday but it was most enjoyable due to a lovely trainer, Della.
That’s all because I’ve been on the go since early this morning and worked overtime, then played with a baby. This lady is headed to bed.
I'm an exuberant 20 something year old seeking, exploring and finding my way.
